Moving Through

10Mar08

17:15

Clyde is now in Afghanistan. After almost two weeks of travel, he is finally at his theater. We’ve been able to maintain fairly regular contact, albeit for fifteen minutes at a time, with a two- to three-second delay, but at least we’re still in touch. That may change, now that he’s where he’s supposed to be, but hope is all that I have these days.

I’m finally learning to cope with everything that is going on in my heart and mind over this deployment. It’s been difficult, and I’m had a hard time coping with the insecurities that the situation brings up for me. Coupled with difficulties at work and here at home, I’ve had a rough time these past weeks but it is certainly getting better.

Now that the deployment has actually begun, I feel a strong sense of relief. The final countdown begins — The countdown to his return. Remarkably, I’ve been able to stop thinking that December is so terribly far away. Considering how young both Clyde and I are, it’s really just a tiny fraction of the time we can choose to share.

That’s another thing that has changed: My view of this relationship. I’ve begun seeing it as something that truly has a potential to be a “forever” thing. Just the potential, though. I’m not banking on anything.

~Betty

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